Monday, September 29, 2014

Why I'm Not a Feminist

This was originally posted on Tumblr, which is infamous for the cruel people claiming to be feminists. I realized I haven't posted a thing on here for a month, but wanted to share this.

This is a hot topic right now, with everyone from Emma Watson to Taylor Swift taking a stand. And I wanted to post my opinion.

I don’t claim to be a feminist. I never really have because my first introduction to one was a woman who used the male gender against those who have it. But I still was at least behind the idea because from kindergarten I’ve had my gender used against me in every way possible. It was just one piece of the hate that’s been thrown my way. I’ve been attacked over my age, gender, race, religion, skin color, class, and probably more things, but I don’t want to spend 2 hours trying to list every derogatory that’s been said with or without physical assault.

I may get hate for this, but I’m just gonna take a page from my religion’s book and say, “hate away and be damned.”

I’m not a feminist. And yet I am.

The original feminists demanded equal rights. They demanded that they’re gender not being put in the equation that people use to determine worth. They demanded that it not be there at all. The law states in the USA that it CAN’T be there for jobs, housing, things like that. But it is. It always is. Always has. They just don’t always vocalize it. The fact that it’s still there is wrong.

Something that keeps popping up, that’s pissing off so many is that the majority of feminists that speak up often turn out to be sexists in disguise. They use men’s gender against them. That is sexism. Just because you’re female does NOT change that. And yet, it still does.

I wanna talk about someone on Tumblr that I used to look up to, long because Tumblr existed. Tamora Pierce. She’s a women’s rights activist. Nothing wrong with that. But everything other thing she said was what a sexist male had said, with the gender term used switched from female or women or girls to male, men, boys.

Which disgusts me.

Gender should not be in the equation. Ever. For or against anything. It shouldn’t be there. Not listed, not used.

And it is. Every. Single. Time.

I’m saying all feminists are men haters or sexist. Just almost every one I’ve ever met since I was in elementary school.

Why I’m not a feminist is because the term is no longer as loose to encompass a grand idea anymore. Feminists should be fighting for ALL rape victims, male or female. Should be fighting for ALL domestic abuse victims. Male, female, children. They should be in equality for ALL. They should be ashamed of ALL use of derogatory things, whether it be against MEN, WOMEN, CHILDREN. GAYS, STRAIGHT. ATHEISTS. RELIGIOUS. POOR. RICH.


Not ONE post, not ONE comment, not ONE speech have I EVER heard a feminist do this. Fighting for equality.

I’m not a feminist because I don’t want to bound by one side. I don’t have a political party for the same reason.

I want EVERYONE to be equal. I want a gender not to matter. Whether I wear skirts and dresses with high heels all time while wearing makeup, or wearing baggy pants, a hoody, barefaced in skater shoes. I’ve seen perhaps the best person who claimed to be a feminist ripped apart on here because she was engaged with a baby on the way. I’ve seen men torn apart because they want to be stay at home dad’s, or wear a man purse. I’ve seen people attacked for EVERYTHING I’VE LISTED.

By “feminists”.

So no, I’m not a feminist.

I believe in 100% equality for children, men, and women.

And while the women the could be beaten bloody by their husbands, fathers, and brothers, marched for equality for all, we’ve lost that. So I’m not a “feminist”. I’m someone that believes in equality.

You can say that’s being a feminist. But not according to almost every single one I’ve seen.

Go ahead, send me anon hate.

Hate away and be damned. I’m gonna be focusing on people that need help.


  1. Someone "reblogged" or shared this post on Tumblr, and this is what they had to say:

    "I remember, in high school and college in the 1990s, a lot of commentary and writing about how the feminist movement was increasingly being overrun by extremists who didn’t care so much about equality as they did pushing their own personal agendas and trying to enforce a groupthink mentality amongst the movement’s membership. Further, any disagreement or difference of opinion with what had become the movement’s mantra was dismissed as anti-feminist “backlash.” One such critic of the movement, Rene Denfeld, saw a lot of similarities to how Victorian-era feminism degenerated into its own brand of loopy extremism and wound up alienating nearly everyone who would otherwise have been happy to join the cause. She also warned that if the then-current feminist movement didn’t stop going off the deep end, it would die a very similar death to that of Victorian-era feminism and render the term “feminist” toxic.

    Sadly, Miss Denfeld wound up being right. Hence the present frustration over whether or not those who believe in equal rights should even bother identifying as feminists.

    Speaking for myself, I firmly believe in equal rights. But I don’t consider myself a feminist, nor am I even comfortable with the word. And my reason is this: it’s a term that’s frequently been used as a cover to push exclusionary, elitist, and intolerant attitudes and agendas. It’s been used to try to blame men for every evil in the world, never mind that evil is a universal human failing regardless of gender. It’s been used to bully and persecute women who don’t live their lives and/or think according to some imaginary purity standard. It’s been used as a means to silence debate and shut out new ideas and perspectives. It’s been used as a tool of self-promotion much as the worst kinds of televangelists (or worse, the Westboro Baptist Church) use God as a smokescreen for their own ends. “Feminism,” as a word, may have started out as a term intended to foster unity and empowerment, but it’s come to mean something much nastier and self-serving over time. And for those of us who believe in equal rights, it’s not a term a lot of us want to be associated with. (Think of how the iron cross and the swastika have been poisoned by association with the Nazis and you get the idea.)

  2. I can appreciate the struggle women have with whether or not to identify as feminists, because they likely don’t want to be faced with the negative connotations of the word. Hell, even in my own community, comic book fandom, cosplayers and female fans are constantly being bullied and treated badly by self-proclaimed feminists for very similar, equally selfish and greedy reasons to the worst male geeks. If memory serves, TGWTG host Susannah Hope Chapman (The JesuOtaku Anime Review) once declined to identify as a feminist because she didn’t want to endorse the intolerant behavior the movement’s engaged in. This isn’t to say there aren’t some really awful misogynists out there. Believe me, there are, and they are a relentless bunch that needs to be dealt with. (Again, I don’t have to look much further than my own fandom for proof of that.) But when a women’s movement professes to be for empowerment and instead engages in the same hateful, entitled, self-aggrandizing bullshit they’re supposedly against, how can anyone be blamed for not wanting to be associated with that, even if just in name?

    I don’t think women and men who believe in equal rights but refuse to call themselves “feminists” are hypocrites or traitors of any sort. I think they’re aware of the bad history behind the term and just want to steer clear of it. And yes, I would consider myself among them. That said, I don’t like identifying as a “geek,” a “nerd,” or even a fan because my community is a hotbed of avarice and blind malice. So maybe I just don’t have a tolerance for assholes of any gender or stripe."

    Make sure to check this link to see all of it, as well as an article they reference.