But this year I didn't have those goals in mind. I wanted to finish writing Warrior, and edit as much as I could. Then I found BookTube, and wanted to post at minimum 3 videos per week, and read 50 books that year. I'd already read about 20 or so when I found that community that I can honestly say I'm apart of, but was suddenly at 56 books and the year was about halfway done. I did some math and figured I could read just over 90 books this year if my pace kept up. So being the overachiever that I am, I made that goal 100 books.
As of 10 minutes ago, I read the final page of my 100th book. And I still have this entire month left to read.
Now, you may think that my goals were kinda lame, as get a car (which I did), or a job (which I did), or go back to school (HA! That takes SERIOUS CASH!) weren't there. But I've learned to take life one day at a time, or even one moment at a time. Life really sucks, and for some reason people seem to think it's a race. You have to follow the one track, and try to be better than everyone including yourself. I've learned that's not true. I decided to spend life chasing happiness, which honestly feels impossible to me. One minute I'm extremely happy, and then a few minutes later I'm terribly miserable. So I made 1 goal, uncertain that I could achieve it. And completed it by February. Everything I've done since then, EVERYTHING is a huge accomplishment to me.
Rediscovering reading, finding BookTube, learning how to film, edit, and post videos, reading a lot, becoming a maid, getting a car, all of these were incredible surprises to me. I've grown a lot this year, even though I still get so excited over things I hop, and I get so depressed I can't really function. Reaching this goal is just a cherry on top of a great year for me, when I was terrified that this year would be full of disappointment and unhappiness and trying to just hang onto the next moment.
I guess what I'm trying to say in this long-winded fashion is that I surprised myself, over and over again. I often wonder how many people actually care about what I do, since I'm not "moving forward" according to the normal raceway. Instead I'm making my own path and learning I love talking to myself, am WAY too obsessed about books, and hate editing my stuff. And learning that I really can reach my goals.
Check out what I read in the pics below, and if you want to see more info, check out my Goodreads Page.
I hope you guys are doing great this year. Even if you aren't, that was me for like, 5 years, so it's okay. Thing's WILL get better if you keep holding on and take life one day or even one moment at a time.
Gotta add this but YAY I DID IT!